And screw the world for calling those big dreams of yours crazy, irresponsible, or just a phase. I call them courageous, visionary, and all-around f*cking EPIC, babes. Don’t let the suffocating dictates of “acceptable” society keep you from embracing your AWESOME. Surround yourself with folks who nurture and feed your flame (like me — wink wink, nudge nudge), not those who smother it. Let me help you coach yourself into your best life ever.
So What Lovely Little Nonconformist Passions Feed MY Flame, You Ask?
WARNING: Here Be Dragonssssss! Or, you know, at least some potentially controversial subject matter and thoughts, anyway. But if you’re here, there’s probably a 99.9% probability that you’re cool with that sort of thing… so by all means, please proceed. Here are a few of the lifestyle-related topics that blow my skirt up and get my little girlie-motor revving these days:
Ahem. In case I haven’t mentioned it already, I f*cking LOVE ’80s movies. And The Karate Kid is no exception. And while we could quite possibly sit here and debate whether or not the Cobra Kais are truly the villains of this movie (and even whether there are truly ever any villains at all anywhere)…
“Fear does not exist in this dojo!” is still a totally kick-ass chant to get yourself psyched up for just about anything. But there’s even MORE ass-kickery to be found in growing the lady-balls (or, you know, whatever kind of balls float your boat) to live your life by this motto.
Why? Because inevitably, over time, we become what we think about.
This is not a new concept, babes. Many of the inspirational speakers, spiritual leaders, and great minds of our time have said it before me, including the Buddha, Ralph Waldo Emerson, and Earl Nightingale. The principles of the much-touted “law of attraction” are grounded in this notion. This idea is also often a big part of the reason why some athletes excel under pressure and others choke.
Of course, making sure that you’re prepared is a component of success, yes. But all the preparation in the world won’t help you much if you spend the majority of your time mentally rehearsing what failure might look like (this is what fear makes us do, whether we realize it or not).
And you can’t feed your flame, realize your dreams, and live large and in-charge while you’re paralyzed by fear.
But! (And this here is a big-ass BUTT “BUT,” y’all… 😜)
But… you don’t necessarily need to overcome fear to move forward. Instead, harness the ENERGY of fear and put it to work for you rather than against you.
To transform fear into something productive, change the focus of your thoughts.
There’s a reason that the physical sensations of excitement and fear in the body are so similar. They’re two sides of the same coin. Focusing on what could go wrong = fear. Focusing on what could go TOTALLY AWESOME for you = excitement!
So Let’s Talk About Your Big Dreams, Babes…
What’s in a flame, anyway?
Flame /ˈflām/ noun: flame
the shining light of a burning fire
a deep passion or desire
a source of warmth and brilliance
a natural agent of change that consumes all obstacles in its path to make way for new growth
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.”
Trish is a holistically minded personal life coaching professional and self-proclaimed “lady-bawse.” Her writings here are aimed at empowering women and other historically marginalized individuals to grab hold of their dreams by learning how to coach themselves. Trish holds probably, like, a bajillion or so random, bizarre certifications, and has completed two different, unreasonably unrelated master’s degrees and somewhere ’round about 1/5th of a Doctorate in Education degree. She still wonders every day when people will figure out that she’s really just faking being a grown-up.